06 December 2004

My spleen...

I'm not much for the NFL anymore.  I grew up a Bears' fan, but the constant over-hype onslaught that began after the Super Bowl win in 1986 gradually drew me to the edge.  When pre-season games became the lead story on the ten o'clock news (not the sports report, but the entire news), I felt things had gone a bit too far.

There's only so many ways you can dress up a 5-7 team, people.  Sure, I'd prefer they win instead of lose, but it doesn't matter much anymore.  Give me the Iowa Hawkeyes over any NFL team anyday.

I think about this because tonight I watched a pro game that brought me back to those times when I used to live or die with the Bears, a time when I was much younger.  Anyone else see the Steelers 17-16 win over Jacksonville tonight?

I am in physical pain after just watching that game.

When the first alien species reaches this planet and they write the history of mankind, I think the substance that they will be completely blown away by will be testosterone.  Forget war, weaponry and general mayhem; they will be in awe of a hormone that let grown men slam into each other for the sole purpose of moving a ball forward, that they put on funky uniforms for protective means when in reality, it just made the crunches and snaps louder.

Who needs points?  Even the place kickers in that game looked like the could skin a bull with their bare hands.

Crash!  Crunch!  Slam!  Watching that game tonight was like watching a fight scene on a "Batman" re-run. 

Bill Cohwer's game face should be the next they sculpt on Mount Rushmore.  He could catch meteors with his lower lip.

I hear the whirlpool calling my name...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

That was a heck of a game...there was a lot of nail-biting going on here, in the home of The Terrible Towel :)