11 September 2005


1. You find out that you have to appear on a daytime talk show.  It doesn't matter whose show you choose, but you must appear on one.  Which show would you pick and why? Does "Jeopardy" count as a talk show?  Wait, even better, I want to appear on "Oprah" and do something that causes her audience to scream in hysterics, like when she has those Christmas shows when she gives a billion dollars of stuff away to all the loonies in the crowd, and they scream and carry on like they have just been splashed with gallons of sulfuric acid.  So I'll get on "Oprah" with the promise of telling my tale of humanity or something, and then just as the story comes to a dramatic conclusion, I'll release a billion scorpions.  Yeah...

2. Have you ever joined an online dating or penpal site?  If so, have you kept in touch with anyone that you met there; if not, have you ever thought about joining up? No, mostly because I would have a hard time trusting the format (for online dating).  I never even thought about a pen pal thing.

3. Who was the last person you promised you'd keep in touch with following a move or job change?  Have you kept in touch? There have been a quite a few people that I got to know well through my former career, and when I left the store that I had been at the longest one of the people I helped the most asked me to keep in touch.  I did for a while, but then it became clear that it was one of those relationships where I would always have to be the one to initiate contact, and I am no good at those.  If the phone rang tomorrow and it was this person, I'd be happy to get caught up.

4. Take this quiz:  What pizza best describes your personality? Meatball.  I'm "Unusual and uncompromising. (TRUE THAT)  You're usually the firstto discover a new trend. (ABSOLUTELY WRONG) You appreciate a good meal and good company. (YEP, ESPECIALLY IF THERE IS SALAD...) You're an interesting blend of traditional and modern." (HMM, SUCH A PHRASE CONFUSES ME, BUT I THINK I AGREE WITH IT ANYWAY)

5. You're having dinner with friends at a restaurant.  Besides the company, what is the most important part of the meal:  the appetizer, the drinks, the salad, the entree, or the dessert? Depends on the restaurant, but most likely the entree.  But reading this, I have to ask-is it time for salad?  I never know when the right time is for salad.  You see everyone eating bread and such, but when is it time for salad?  It's so confusing, I just don't know when it's time for salad.  Are you having a salad?  Can I ask for a salad?  What if I ask for a salad and they were already bringing one out for me?  Is it OK to have a salad after the entree?  It's so confusing, someone needs to write a book on it or something.  So, are you having salad?

(There is one person reading this who has just wet themselves.  All others, just move along)

6. Have you ever submitted a Reader's Choice question to the "Saturday Six?"  If so, did the answers surprise you?  If not, why haven't you? No.  I would never want to participate in something that would accept a question from the likes of me.

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