06 May 2004

Take me out of the ballgame...

Saw most of the Cubs 11-3 win over Arizona today.

It's early May, so kids are still in school.  The weather today was OK, not great, overcast and in the 60's.  Arizona is not exactly one of the Cubs largest rivalries.  Yet Wrigley Field was packed today, a rare sight for an afternoon game on a Thursday this time of the year.

I'm fine with that, of course.  I love the electric feel of the park when it is full.  I've been to hundreds of games in my life, and I don't care what anyone says, people are there to watch the game and cheer for the Cubs.  The image of Wrigley as a place where people go to be seen and not care about the game is wrong.  I have no idea why that stereotype has been perpetuated so much in the last decade.

Anyway, it's great to watch a game in May that feels like a game in October.  It looks like all 81 games at Wrigley this year are going to have a playoff atmosphere.

I do have one complaint, though.

This year the Cubs put in over 200 new "dugout" premium seats.  They are located directly behind home plate and they are indeed pricey.  Every seat for every game this year has been sold for this section.  A good deal of people in these seats can be seen on television, as the primary game action camera angle is from center field, looking into home plate.

Today I saw the same thing over and over again, people in these seats on cell phones and waving to the camera with their other hand.  No doubt these people are calling family and friends saying "look at me!  I'm on TV!"  Congratulations, you've paid $250 for that honor.  And I've seen it every single time I have watched a Cubs home game this season.

I'd love to see these idiots take a foul ball off the head while they were busy wasting their cell minutes rather than pay attention to the game, but the screen protecting these fans won't allow that to happen.  I have a better idea.  There is a small patio access area upstairs behind the broadcast booth at Wrigley Field.  Someone needs to put a cherry picker there, one with a neck long enough to reach down over the media section and into the premium seats.  Then remove the basket from it and instead put a set of jaws on it. 

On the west side of Wrigley Field is a parking lot used by players and media.  I propose eliminating about three or four of these spaces, and in its place building a container that rises two stories.  Then fill it with chocolate pudding.

When someone is spotted preening for the camera, cell phone to their ear, let's have the jaws snap down, snatch the idiot by the head, and jettison them over the stadium into the container of pudding.  There could even be an "idiot pudding-cam" that captures the whole thing.  I'm sure that would be high viewing on Jumbotrons all over the country, not to mention SportsCenter.  That's the whole point of it, right, to be seen on television?

What are you going to tell your grandkids thirty years from now?  That you were once seen waving on television in the background of a baseball game, or that you were seen being hurled out of a stadium into a vat of pudding?

And when the weather gets really hot?  YUMMY.

14 comments:

orphanme said...

Super job Ber.  I could not agree with you more.  I've been a Cubs fan for 58 years, and no one has to see me suffer on TV.  I bleed Cubs blue.  Go Cubs

tmmcder said...

the Cubs will always be losers,it is just there destiny.If people think that people just goto the games because they love watching the Cubs then the joke is on them.Look at most of the people there,they couldnt tell you the score of the game,but they could tell you who the last five people they called when at the game.Look at the history of the Cubs,they havent had two stright winning seasons since 1972?plus they havent won a world series in wrigley field period.the place doesnt have any history.think about it how many hallfamers do the cubs have?I dont think Ron Santo deserves to be in the hallfame either,hey as nice of a man as he is he doesnt deserve the hallfame sorry!Why in the world would Fans of a team look back at a team ('69 cubs)and make them look like they won a world series when the team collasped and fell apart and was a big disapointment to baseball and the city of chicago.If that team was so good why didnt it win a division or a world series?and if you think this years team will win it just think of that '69 Cubs team and how promising it was too.then you will know that the Cubs are losers and the fans come to the park just to drinks there sorrows out.........Oh im not a Sox fan either.....so dont get me started about them..........lol.........and yes i have lived all my life in chicago too.

mightyziem said...

I've only lived in Chicago for two and a half years, and I have to respectfully disagree with your comments. To me, there seem to be two kinds of Cubs fans. There are those who follow the team through thick and thin and bleed Cubbie blue. Then there are those who come to Wrigley because it's a quaint, trendy place to be, then spend six innings on their cell phones calling everyone they can talking about how cool it is to be in a quaint, trendy place like Wrigley. I can't say I'm a lifelong Cubs fan, but I put myself in the former category. The ballpark is a place I go to get away from cell phones, computer, etc. for a few hours. Personally, I think that people who use cellphones during games should be tossed. They're no less obnoxious than the loud guy who's had one too many Budweisers.

fperryjr64 said...

I'm a Cardnils fan and I dont appreciate us getting wooped up on by Da Cubs! But hey, it's May...
We'll be seeing you in October

gvkohanski said...

So, whatever happen to the "Bleacher Bums" of yesterday?

lamarx03 said...

I do agree there are fans who do actually watch the game and follow the Cubs. But there are many of them who are tourists from out of town, college students who skip class to attend a game, people who want to be seen on television, people who want to get drunk, and my all time favorite..."Yuppies." It's hard to judge whether a Cubs fan is really a Cubs fan nowadays because it's like there are so many of them. But try asking any of them what they love most and hate most about the Cubs, listen to what they say, then try to judge if this fan is a real fan. Maybe you'll get your answer.

sandbag7 said...

A rare sight; a stadium full of yuppie business men out to impress their kindred spirits.  Mmmm, sounds reaaal electric.  The tribal juices are flowing.. Go Cubs... our millionaires are better than yours.  Its kind of like the Old Colloseum Days, entertainment for the rich and the masses to take their mins off the real world.

dj2bee76 said...

You made some really great points ber144. I wish people would just call Cub fans the most loyal fans in the game. People always say that the only reason we draw fans is because of Wrigley Field. Then why is it we sell out Miller Park everytime the Cubs and Brewers play? More then half of the fans are cheering for the Cubs. We also set a new spring training attendance record this year. The atmosphere at a Cubs game is like no other. I have been to many ballparks in my day and the only park that comes close is Fenway. Go Cubs!

gpmumbles said...

I USED TO LIVE AT DIVERSEY AND SHEFFIELD, BUT HAVE RESIDED IN SOUTH CAROLINA FOR THE LAST 20 YEARS. THE BEAUTY OF WRIGLEY FIELD HAS ALLWAYS BEEN THAT NO MATTER WHERE YOU SAT YOU HAD A GREAT VIEW OF THE ENTIRE FIELD. CONTRARY TO SOX FANS, THE CUBS FANS REMAIN STEADFAST THROUGH GOOD AND BAD TIMES, AND THERE IS NOTHING I WOULD LIKE BETTER THAN TO GO TO A GAME AT WRIGLEY AND ENJOY THE COMPANY OF OTHER FANS REGARDLESS OF WHERE I SAT. I HAVE TO ADMIT THOUGH THAT IF I WAS TO BE ABLE TO GO TO A GAME IT WOULD BE HARD TO RESIST CALLING HOME TO TELL MY FAMILY WHAT A GOOD TIME I WAS HAVING. IT JUST MIGHT BE THAT SOME OF THE FANS SITTING IN THOSE SEATS SPENT OVER A THOUSAND DOLLARS IN AIRFARE HOTEL ETC. JUST TO ENJOY THAT FEELING THAT FANS LIVING IN CHICAGO TAKE FOR GRANTED. WE ALL NEED TO RELAX AND ACCEPT THAT CUBS FANS ARE THE GREATEST AND WHEREVER THEY SIT IT IS FOR THE LOVE OF THE CUBBIES.

raceboyb16 said...

all i have to say is i live in so cal. i've been a dodger fan my whole life and i can respect the cub fans because they never give up loving those lovable losers i saw the dodgers win one in 88' i was like 9 years old but they've sucked ever since see unlike the cubs fans the dodger fans in so cal. all of a sudden turned to angel fans in 02' when they won the series (us dodger fans call them freeway hoppers) anyways you'd never see a cubs fan turn to a white sox fan just cuz the sox where doing good.

didonato1929 said...

     i have gone to 2 cub games and i will never go to another.
they only go there to drink and cuirse. i took my granddaughter
to the last game that i will ever attend there, i couldnt buy her
a coke , all the venders only came by with beers and sitting behind us was this middle aged woman cursing like a drunken
sailor. i got up took this child and left. they brag how great the cub fans are. i come from ny and i have been to shea and the stadium and i have never seen such rowdy fans

babasbobby said...

To the guy who's been to 2 Cub games and will never return because of a profain drunk:

1) If I were you (and I've done this many times before) and some idiot was ruining my enjoyment of the game, I would've had a conversation with the "decent" fans around me tp drum up support for security to remove the idiot.  That's what they're getting paid for, Dummy!

2) Cubs fans are rowdy but I've never seen one pick a fight with someone routing for the other team (like they do in New York, Boston and Philly). and...

3) You simply must not be a Cub's fan otherwise you'd understand the passion of waiting year after year for a championship!

Of course we're rowdy, WE LOVE OUR CUBBIES!!!

jcfprint said...

the only thing lower than a cubs fan is a yankees fan!

scookneat said...

I agree about those seats that they put behind home plate. My theory is that during the week these seats are given to tourist or business associates who buy them to give away, because it does seem that on weekends they are the real Cubs fans who are really watching the games,but what's with all the cell phones?