Saw most of the Cubs 11-3 win over Arizona today.
It's early May, so kids are still in school. The weather today was OK, not great, overcast and in the 60's. Arizona is not exactly one of the Cubs largest rivalries. Yet Wrigley Field was packed today, a rare sight for an afternoon game on a Thursday this time of the year.
I'm fine with that, of course. I love the electric feel of the park when it is full. I've been to hundreds of games in my life, and I don't care what anyone says, people are there to watch the game and cheer for the Cubs. The image of Wrigley as a place where people go to be seen and not care about the game is wrong. I have no idea why that stereotype has been perpetuated so much in the last decade.
Anyway, it's great to watch a game in May that feels like a game in October. It looks like all 81 games at Wrigley this year are going to have a playoff atmosphere.
I do have one complaint, though.
This year the Cubs put in over 200 new "dugout" premium seats. They are located directly behind home plate and they are indeed pricey. Every seat for every game this year has been sold for this section. A good deal of people in these seats can be seen on television, as the primary game action camera angle is from center field, looking into home plate.
Today I saw the same thing over and over again, people in these seats on cell phones and waving to the camera with their other hand. No doubt these people are calling family and friends saying "look at me! I'm on TV!" Congratulations, you've paid $250 for that honor. And I've seen it every single time I have watched a Cubs home game this season.
I'd love to see these idiots take a foul ball off the head while they were busy wasting their cell minutes rather than pay attention to the game, but the screen protecting these fans won't allow that to happen. I have a better idea. There is a small patio access area upstairs behind the broadcast booth at Wrigley Field. Someone needs to put a cherry picker there, one with a neck long enough to reach down over the media section and into the premium seats. Then remove the basket from it and instead put a set of jaws on it.
On the west side of Wrigley Field is a parking lot used by players and media. I propose eliminating about three or four of these spaces, and in its place building a container that rises two stories. Then fill it with chocolate pudding.
When someone is spotted preening for the camera, cell phone to their ear, let's have the jaws snap down, snatch the idiot by the head, and jettison them over the stadium into the container of pudding. There could even be an "idiot pudding-cam" that captures the whole thing. I'm sure that would be high viewing on Jumbotrons all over the country, not to mention SportsCenter. That's the whole point of it, right, to be seen on television?
What are you going to tell your grandkids thirty years from now? That you were once seen waving on television in the background of a baseball game, or that you were seen being hurled out of a stadium into a vat of pudding?
And when the weather gets really hot? YUMMY.