It's noon here. I'm getting married in 210 minutes. You'd think perhaps I'd have more pressing issues than writing. But the truth is, I'm bored. I'm just sitting in a hotel room waiting for the time to start getting dressed.
This is surreal. I still don't feel much in the way of nerves. I feel like I am waiting to catch a plane or something. We've been waiting so long for this day yet it still amazes me that it is finally here.
I miss my father today. Dad never gave me advice about marriage because I never asked. He respected the boundaries that his kids had on their lives, and thus only offered advice when asked for it. I picked his wonderful brain thousands of times, but we never got around to discussing marriage. I observed it though. My parents were married for almost 42 years and I was around for the last 35 of them. I learned many things about creating a loving family from my parents, and I will do my best to lead by their example in my own marriage. If I am to be a good husband and father, it will be because of what my mother and father showed and taught me.
I am not the most spiritual person. I struggle at times with the knowledge of science and the unknown of faith. I want their to be explanations for everything, so at times I find it hard to believe things are so just because they are. But as I have grown older I see examples of things happening that I believe are the result of faith. I lost my father almost three years ago. Nine months after he died, I met the love of my life, the woman that I was destined to spend eternity with. I don't believe that happened by accident. I think my father was looking out for me, and made sure he steered me in Kristen's direction.
My mother fell in love with Kristen almost as quickly as I did, and has opened her arms up to her, welcoming her into our family.
For what both my father and mother have done, I will always be grateful. I may not be able to shake Dad's hand today after my wedding, but I will surely feel him there with me, just as I have every day for almost three years.
I will dance with my mother tonight, and we will celebrate the life that she and my father gave me.